Once upon a time there was a cold country where no one respected beauty and love was deemed totally worthless. The only thing worshipped was price tags and only that which was useful was considered good.
In Whore Story (Huorasatu) the goddess Aphrodite decides to pay a visit to this land to change its ways. She moves into the house of the beautiful but penniless Milla and suggests that she should also change. And so Milla becomes a whore, and a good one too. At least for a while.
Milla's best friend, idealistic Mia, wants to break the chains restricting humans and animals. She aims to reach these goals with the help of God, but it turns out that God has other views of paradise. Milla's neighbour, the sexy cleaning lady Kalla, is raped and decides to take care of two hyena bitches called Fear and Terror whom Mia has liberated from the zoo. She decides that no one will ever do anything unpleasant to her simply because she happens to be a woman who likes to look like a woman.
The patriarchy doesn't like the rebellion of these women and so Isis, the mother of all gods, is sent to judge them for their inappropriate behaviour. Can the women of the story continue their lives in the Finnish society, and what are the alternatives?
4 F, 2 M.
1. Act I
<3 Blondie’s gig
DEBBIE
Why are you crying?
MILLA
Because my feet hurt so much. And because I love you so much.
DEBBIE
So it’s a tough choice, huh?
MILLA
No, there’s no choice. I’m staying.
DEBBIE
You know, I used to be a hooker.
MILLA
Yeah, I know.
DEBBIE
That was back in the old days. I’m not a whore anymore.
MILLA
Yea, you’re a bit old for that, aren’t you?
DEBBIE
Age doesn’t have anything to do with it.
MILLA
I’m 22.
DEBBIE
You’ve got your whole life ahead of you.
MILLA
I don’t think so.
DEBBIE
No.
MILLA
Age doesn’t have anything to do with it.
DEBBIE
I’m sixty-something, you know.
MILLA
Yeah. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you.
DEBBIE
That’s right.
MILLA
Debbie, please help me.
DEBBIE
It’s not about me, it’s about you.
MILLA
How am I supposed to know what to do?
DEBBIE
Where’s your mom, honey?
MILLA
I don’t need a mom, I need money.
DEBBIE
Everybody needs a mom.
MILLA
Yeah, but I’m on my own now.
DEBBIE
That’s my girl.
MILLA
Can I ask you something?
DEBBIE
Sure.
MILLA
Why do you wear clothes that make you look fat?
DEBBIE
I’m not doing it now, am I?
MILLA
Am I dreaming?
DEBBIE
Nah, I’m just so gorgeous.
MILLA
I want to be you.
DEBBIE
It’s really just a matter of luck.
MILLA
Oh. Shit.
DEBBIE
So good luck. I wish you the best.
(...)
[Translated from the Finnish by Kristian London.]